Home  Articles Sibling's Grief Developmental Stages in Child's Understanding of Death or Loss
|
|
Developmental Stages in Child's Understanding of Death or Loss |
|
|
|
Written by -Deb Sims MS, RNCS, LCSW
|
|
Saturday, 31 December 2005 |
|
DEVELOPMENTAL STAGES IN A CHILD'S UNDERSTANDING OF DEATH OR LOSS.
-Deb Sims MS, RNCS, LCSW
Taken from "Transitions" Mid April, 2000. A Death and Dying Grief Support Newsletter from "Beyond Indigo." To subscribe to the newsletter visit: http://www.beyondindigo.com/newsletters/
During very early childhood approximately birth to age 3:
A child views death as a loss, separation or abandonment. They are less disturbed by losing someone than an older child because of their difficulty understanding the whole concept. The most important element at this stage is the response of the living parent and significant others around them. If that security remains intact and schedules remain as normal as possible, they eventually make it through. They take their clues from the security or lack of it around them. It isn't that they don't grieve and we shouldn't pretend nothing has happened, it's just they gain security and transition based on the living parent's response to grief.
Ages 3 to 6:
At this stage a child sees things as reversible and temporary. They may believe in "magical thinking" and that their thoughts can cause things to happen. This can work in either direction causing them to blame themselves unnecessarily or believe if they are "good" enough perhaps their parent will return. Often, children will exhibit nightmares, confusion, revert to an earlier stage of development or even seem to be unaffected by the death.
Ages 7 to 8:
Here a child will begin to see death as final. They may have lost an animal at this point but they usually don't think about it as happening to them. They see it more as something that may occur in an accident, like a car accident or only in old age. They may show an unusual interest in knowing the details surrounding death, begin asking what happens after death, or again act as if nothing has happened. Social development is occurring during this stage so they'll watch how others respond and may even want to know how they should act.
Ages 9 and up:
By now the child understands that death is final and irreversible. They not only know it could happen to someone else but also to themselves. They may exhibit a wide range of feelings including: shock, denial, anxiety and fear, anger, depression even withdrawal. Their reactions begin to be much more like an adult except they may act out their grief by behavioral changes at home or school.
|
|
Last Updated ( Saturday, 31 December 2005 )
|
|
|
Calendar of Events
 |
October 2008 |
 |
|
Please Register
Beraved family members, please register here to have access to our other features. Registration is free however registration needs to be approved by our admins. Once registration is approved, please login with your username and password . Registered users need to be logged in by using the login form below to see the User Menu.
Want to Volunteer?
If you would like to volunteer some of your spare time to work for TCF and would like to find out more about how you can 'put back' into The Compassionate friends, download Volunteer Form (word doc) and fill up the form. Then submit the same form by emailing us at info@compassioantefriends.info . Read more on how to become a volunteer.
We Charge No Dues
WE CHARGE NO DUES- There are no fees, however, we are supported by LOVE GIFTS and contributions, provided in memory of our loved ones, so that we may reach out to others in their bereavement through our chapter resources such as Newsletters, Website, Postage stamps, Lending library and brochures. (support the isulong seoph )
Chapter Meeting
Our monthly support group meeting is the heart of TCF. These gatherings provide a caring environment in which bereaved parents and adult siblings can talk freely about the emotions and experiences they are going through and receive the understanding support of others who have "been there." Read more.
TCF Principles
TCF offers friendship and understanding to bereaved parents. TCF believes that bereaved parents can help each other toward a positive resolution of their grief. TCF reaches out to all bereaved parents across barriers of religion, race, income or ethnic group. TCF understands that every bereaved parent has individual needs and rights. TCF helps bereaved parents primarily through local chapters. TCF chapters belong to their members. TCF chapters are coordinated nationally to extend help to each other and to individual bereaved parents everywhere. Read more on Our Principles
|
Post New Event