Home  Articles General Bereavement It's My Choice To Be A Survivor ...or a Victim
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It's My Choice To Be A Survivor ...or a Victim |
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Written by TCF
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Tuesday, 27 December 2005 |
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It's My Choice To Be A Survivor ...
Or A Victim
As a Bereaved parent, I have choices in how I will cope with my grief. I can choose:
TO seek out people and resources who will listen and care when I need support, OR, retreat from life and isolate myself from sources of support.
TO search for meaningful things to give my life a sense of purpose, OR, to decide I have no hope or purpose in life and that I have nothing to live for.
TO realize that loss is only one of the factors in my life,OR, see myself n as a bereaved parent primarily, and allow my having experienced the death to blacken and disrupt all aspects of my life.
TO communicate with family and friends when I need information and help, OR, wait for others to discover what I need, get angry, and pity myself when they don't.
TO accept what is gone, or not within my control and
take action on what I CAN do, OR, constantly pity
myself over what has changed, and what I CANT
do.
TO try to understand how my family feels, that they
hurt too, OR, feel that absolutely no one can understand me and what I'm going through.
TO look for ways to FIGHT BACK against negative feelings, OR, feel that I am helpless and at the mercy of fate.
TO talk about fears with someone I trust, OR, bottle up fears, and horrors that are unexpressed and let them have a lot of power over me.
TO accept my grief as a necessary process in my recovery from loss, OR, be ashamed of my grief and pretend that all is well, to protect the discomfort of others.
TO be angry at the circumstances of the death and
seek comfort and strength from God, OR, blame God
for my circumstances and be angry, bitter, and alienated from Him.
Adapted from Positive Patterns Of Survival
A segment from the "I Can Cope" course
Taken from the Brandywine, DE Chapter, TCF
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